l.i.b.e.r.a.t.i.o.n. theory

love, life, and the pursuit of liberation

Telling the Truth: Inaction and Failure

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In my quest to honor myself, I’ve been having epiphanies left and right. I’ve been spending time observing myself—my thought patterns, my actions, my habits, my patterns. While this has been deeply enlightening because I’ve gotten to realize some truths about myself and my needs, an even more profound observation has surfaced. I’m afraid of action. I can wax poetically about the metaphysical meanings of situations, analyze the cosmos, think, pray, think some more. But when it comes down to doing something about what I know deep in my gut is true and necessary, I freeze. I come up with all sorts of excuses and rationales, but the truth is that all that’s there are guilt and fear. In all my overthinking I discovered two distinct patterns:

1-      Unless there’s a specific impetus or immediate reason, I’ll refrain from action. Therefore, I feel re-actions are permissible and valid.

2-      Unless I have absolute certainty about my path or odds of success, I won’t entertain even a first step.

A friend pointed out that I’m afraid of failure. “Aren’t we all?” I asked. Then I realized that perhaps not. Most people can accept failure and move on. For me, failure is deeply personal. It means that I’ve failed as a human being and am bad and undeserving. I know that sounds crazy, but I realize that’s been my mental trap. When I stop and really think about it, the truth is that I’ve survived any and everything I truly “failed” at. And I’ve become better. So my fear of failure is false because my truth of failure has never been that bad. In fact it’s been transformative.

So where do I go from here? Taking the first step. Telling the whole truth.


8 comments on “Telling the Truth: Inaction and Failure

  1. Mo
    November 8, 2012

    OMG! Get OUT OF MY HEAD. I just had a conversation about this the other day and this is ME ALL THE WAY…. wow!



    • liberationtheory
      November 8, 2012

      So that means its been spoken and we both have to DO something about it!


  2. Pingback: Truth Will Always Be Truth | This Day With God

  3. pjgracecommunity
    November 9, 2012

    I like this post, I thought I’ll share my thoughts with you


  4. Autumn
    November 13, 2012

    Did I type this? I have been facing this very thing within myself, yet I am paralyzed to move on. It’s as if I am in a perpetual state of self imposed stagnation.


    • liberationtheory
      November 14, 2012

      Trust and believe I understand!! You know what my first step was? Prayer. Pure and simply.


  5. Autumn
    November 15, 2012

    There is something about prayer that forces a you to face yourself.


    • liberationtheory
      November 15, 2012

      Sometimes the prayer can be a petition for truth and guidance, as well as the courage to face them.


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This entry was posted on November 8, 2012 by in how to honor yourself, Uncategorized and tagged .

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